Challenges

As moms, we all have challenges that you have to struggle with on a day to day basis. There are times you feel overwhelmed and the big picture gets clouded by difficulties you may have as a parent. At least that is how I often felt because I have strong willed children of varying degrees. The following examples are a taste of what it was like on the hard days of being a mom to my three (now grown) kids.

I remember a time when my oldest son was 2 years old and bedtimes could be a battle. Our house was fairly new to us, so we hadn’t got around to changing the door knob to his room. He ended up locking himself in his bedroom because he did not want to go to bed. I had to call my husband to come home from a youth event so he could remove the door knob to get inside.

Another time, this same son was in the 2’s and 3’s class at church. Since it was Mother’s Day, a couple of dad’s took over the class. After doing their reoccurring headcount, they realized that one of the kids was missing. The dads looked out the window to discover my son taking a stroll out in the church parking lot with a toy shopping cart. Fortunately, they were able to get to him before he made his way to the street. He is the reason the church got a better kid proof door. On another occasion, he escaped out the front door of our house when I was pregnant with our second son, and a friend who came to the door when I open it, had to go run and catch him.

My other son has always been my curious child. When he was younger he wondered what would happen if he plugged up the sink in the bathroom. Instead of asking my husband and I what the result would be, he decided that he would try an experiment to see for himself. We were eating dinner and my husband and I heard the sound of running water coming from the bathroom. We ran to the bathroom to find the sink overflowing with the floor covered in water and it was dripping down to the basement. We informed him that next time he needed to ask us before experimenting like that. When he was older, that curiosity transitioned into some epic arguments he would get into with my husband and I.

I recall another time when my 4 or 5 year old daughter had a rough evening. Cooperation was not in her vocabulary that night. She would rather miss dinner than obey what I asked of her. She held out for so long on her bed that she fell asleep until morning. Naps were also a struggle with two of my children. I remember my daughter not wanting to stay in her toddler bed for a nap. She did eventually fall asleep-right on the other side of the closed door. She eventually turned over so I could squeeze in and put her in the bed.

I home schooled all 3 of my children. This also came with some challenges. We had many good days, but there were rough ones as well. Each one of them had days here and there where they didn’t feel like doing school or following through on what I asked. I would often worry they wouldn’t be prepared when they graduated high school. When they did math, each of them expressed displeasure at having to show their work, but I tried to not let that deter me. I attempted to explain my reasons, but at the time I wasn’t sure if it sunk in.

Rewards

My kids are now young adults. My husband and I are encouraged to see them following Christ and serving Him at church. We are thankful that all of them see the importance of serving others, no matter whether they are helping at church by working with children, being on the worship team, working with youth, or running the computer.

All three of my kids have tender hearts. They like giving me comfort when I am sad, which is a reward I love. If they hear that I am upset, they will come seek me out to give me a hug and ask if I am okay. My daughter also has the gift of encouragement and will amaze me when she has the words I need to hear at just the right time. My son, Zach, loves giving gifts. He always makes a point of filling each of our stockings at Christmas with a few fun gifts for each of us.

My oldest son, Alec, found a productive outlet (instead of giving me grey hairs) by teaching himself to play the guitar. He uses his talent to play on the worship team at church. He also spends his free time recording his own music. Zach, has learned to make movies and has had classes on production. He has used his creativity to make two videos for the nonprofit that my husband is the executive director of. He is following in his dad’s footsteps, by pursuing a degree in Youth Ministry. Zach and my daughter, Emma, both love writing stories, and I am in awe to see how much their writing has developed. My daughter is also about to graduate with a degree in journalism with a minor in creative writing and philosophy.

As for making my kids show their math work, I have felt relief and pride knowing they all have done much better in math than my husband or I. In fact, my oldest made me tear up when he thanked me for making him show his work in math because he said it made doing math easier in college. By the way, he earned a degree in engineering and was a math minor in college.

So whether you are a mom, or dad, or you work with kids in some capacity, you don’t always see the long term benefits. There were times I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel. But I want to encourage you to continue to do the right or hard things-even when they complain. Even though you may never see the rewards of your labor-be consistent, love your kids, pray for them, invest in them and trust God for the results.